Lust and Jealousy: Why Polyamory Doesn't Work

"Polyamory" means "many loves" but is basically another term for swinging. The gist of it is that two committed partners agree to get sex on the side from strangers but be open about it with each other instead of hiding it like adulterers. The argument for this lifestyle arrangement is that humans are not monogamous, so people should not fight their lust but satisfy it. Practitioners claim this arrangement works for them. I don't think it does.

I can agree that you can't turn off lust. Lust is natural. Lust is the reason we have 6 billion humans crawling all over this planet. The sex drive is a biological drive to procreate. It is powerful. I can agree with polyamorists on this point. You aren't going to turn this off. But you aren't going to turn off jealousy either.

Jealousy is as much a biological drive as lust. Jealousy wants exclusivity. This helps further our genes over the genes of others. It also makes women want to keep their provider on hand to help tend to the offspring. Jealousy is as natural as lust.

The result of all this jealousy and lust is a biological double standard. Humans want to be promiscuous, but they don't want their partners to be promiscuous. This selfishness fits perfectly in line with the drive to reproduce. It does not fit in with our desire to be happy.

Most people cheat, and this is just a fact of life. The dismalness of this fact is the primary reason I do not care to marry. I want to be able to expunge any woman I am dating with the least amount of hassle because I know it is only a matter of time when she decides to fuck some other guy. I have always been happy with one woman, but I am rare in this regard. Love is like one giant sadistic game. Everyone who plays is a loser.

I practice serial monogamy. I stick faithfully to one woman in a temporary relationship. Instead of lust and jealousy, I have love and mistrust. It takes a certain amount of delusion to get married, and I don't have it. It also takes a certain amount of sickness to hurt someone with infidelity, and I don't have this either. I am neither victimizer nor victim. It is the best answer I can come up with.

The bottom line is that love does not last.

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