Birthday

Today is my 41st birthday. It is not as momentous as hitting 40. There is something about those round figures that makes them significant to us.

Birthdays are a reminder that we are going to fucking die. The clock is always ticking. One day, it will all be over with. What will that be like? You already know. Just go back to that blackness before your earliest memory. Before you were born, you did not exist. You will simply return to that state. If you have ever fainted or simply went to sleep, this is what death is like.

Death is not something you can experience because experience requires consciousness. Ultimately, life is consciousness. I learned that from watching various zombie flicks. It doesn't matter if your body moves if your brain is dead. What we cherish most are those brains. That gray stuff between your ears is who you truly are.

Immortality is merely the extension of one's consciousness for infinity. We can handle the change in consciousness and actually cherish it. I don't know of anyone who would want to go back to their youth without the knowledge they now possess. So, I put it to people. Would you rather be young again and stupid? Or would you rather be old and wise? I think most people choose the wisdom. I know I do.

I know so much more now than I did then. I actually look forward to what I will know in 20 years. The reality is that wisdom requires years, and there is no substitute for this. In that respect, I look forward to getting older. My body will eventually fail me, and my brain will fail as well. But I write it down. Writing is all I can do to extend my consciousness beyond my expiration date. My birthday is just a reminder to live more deliberately as the sand leaves the top to the bottom.

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