Altruism, Narcissism, and Egoism

Much of this article is inspired by the writings and the philosophy of Ayn Rand. I do not agree on all points with Ms. Rand, so please take this all with a grain of salt.

I was watching a children's program one day and was a bit miffed at the moral lessons being taught on this program. In the program, some bug family gives their last bit of honey to the ants. When the child asks the mother why she gave away the last bit of honey, the mother replies, "We should put others before ourselves." I thought this was utterly retarded. I could understand if they had a surplus of honey, but they were on their last bit. Dumb. Utterly stupid.

People may think I am being harsh here, but that is because of the lessons our culture teaches us along with its necessary hypocrisy. We are taught from a young age that we should be selfless and sacrifice for others and the "greater good." The net effect of all this selflessness is to be more accomodating of the tyranny of government, religion, etc. in our lives.

Altruism is the belief that a life of selflessness is the best way to live. Experience and common sense will show that this is not the best way to live and is antithetical to life itself. I will now demonstrate.

You work and get a paycheck. Now, there are other people who are certainly in greater poverty than yourself. The whole of sub-saharan Africa is a good place to start. Those people are worse off than even the homeless in America. Should you cash your check and send it to them and give up the luxuries you enjoy such as a flush toilet and air conditioning? Should your family starve so that their families can eat?

I don't know of anyone idiotic enough to actually argue for this type of sacrifice. Even if they are, I highly doubt they do this themselves. It will surprise you to learn just how well off many egalitarians and leftists are. They will argue so passionately about equality, the greater good, and sacrifice all while enjoying benefits of our selfish, capitalistic, individualistic culture. Many communists are filthy fucking rich.

The people that preach sacrifice are narcissists. One great example would be Bono who lectures the rest of the world about their greed and insensitivity while enjoying himself on the French Riviera. Another would be Marxist G.A. Cohen who defends his own lifestyle by saying it would be much harder for him to part with his wealth than it would be for common folks like you and I. Therefore, he needs to keep his money while you part with yours. You can hear him make this argument here.

Narcissism is the belief that others should sacrifice for you. The reason narcissists preach altruism is because they feel some guilt for their good fortune and/or theft. So, they preach to everyone else. This lets them off the hook much the same way a carbon offset lets Al Gore off the hook for his wasteful energy consumption. By making you sacrifice a greater amount, this lets the narcissist not sacrifice at all. If you find this hypocritical and nauseating, join the club.

Egoism stands opposed to both altruism and narcissism. Egoism holds that you should not sacrifice for others. It also holds that others should not sacrifice for you. It is rational selfishness. It is moral, and it is right.

The Golden Rule is based upon egoism. We should do unto others as we would have them do unto us. We measure our morality by our own self-interest. Self-interest is not immoral. It is actually the only true morality there is.

Altruism is merely a tool for guilt. It is a way for people to exert power and control over you. So many times, I see relationships where people are caught in this shitty thinking where they feel bad for wanting to be happy or feel guilty for enjoying something. The argument is implied that you do not have a right to be happy unless everyone else is happy. You owe everyone else the fruits of your labor or whatever else that you have. You are required to give and maybe--MAYBE--you might get something back.

All collectivist ideologies from religion to Communism to fascism to our current Bush flavored patriotism has this altruistic justification at its core. We are to subordinate ourselves to the greater good. Naturally, we will be showered with gratitude from those we sacrificed to, and this will make it all worthwhile. The reality is that you end up sacrificing and even dying for the selfish sake of some narcissistic egomaniac who really could give a fuck about you.

On a personal level, I see this thing a lot and even lived it. There are people in this world who will take all that you have to give, demand even more, treat you like shit when you can't deliver, and simply devour you until you are miserable, commit suicide, or wise up and get the fuck away from them. This is why altruism is antithetical to life. It makes you want to give up and die.

The biggest problem area on this deals with your loved ones. These are your family and friends. You will know who loves you because the moment you stop giving, they turn on you and toss you. It hurts to realize that the people who loved you were really just using you the whole time. You were a means to their end. When you stop being that means, they have no problem whatsoever disposing of you. Remember, these were the people who told you to be selfless and sacrificial.

I am not selfless and sacrificial. This does not mean that I do not give. I give all the time because it pleases me to do this. I do it for the sake of my own happiness. When I give, I truly give because I expect nothing back because I have already received what I was seeking. I give out of selfishness. We all do this to some extent.

Consider taking a shower. I do this because I want to do this. I think you do it for the same reason. But who benefits? It is all the people who don't have to smell your funky ass. In economics, this is called an externality. Externalities are excess benefits or costs that come to a third party in an economic transaction. For instance, Shakespeare wrote plays for his ticket buying public. But Shakespeare is dead, and you get to read his work without paying him or his estate one red cent. You are enjoying a positive externality of his work. A negative externality is when a tree hugger drives his oil burning VW with the Greenpeace sticker through town polluting the air you breathe.

Egoists produce positive externalities and minimize negative externalities. We benefit from their "generosity" The reality is they are not being generous at all but pursuing their own ends. We reap the benefits and consequences of those actions. For instance, you benefit everyday from the selfish pursuits of Thomas Edison who died a long time ago. Edison didn't give a fuck about you because he didn't even know who you were. You didn't even exist. But he changed your life, and I bet you are grateful for it unless you are the most primitive of Luddites.

Narcissists want the direct benefit of your work as opposed to the indirect benefit. In short, they want to be the master, and they yoke you with their slave morality. They will gladly take all that you give but call you selfish for wanting to keep even a little of what is yours. These types of people become politicians, preening moralizing celebrities, and domineering parents and lovers.

By being selfish in the egoistic sense, everyone benefits. You give, but this giving is not sacrificial. It is fulfilling and satisfying. It does not lead to bitterness. It leads to utter happiness. It is truly the only way to live. To be anything else is to be a slave or a master. I am neither of these things.

I have spent years posting to this blog. I do this for my own self-indulgence. I love to write, and I will always write until I am dead. I don't make any money from this, but I still do it. I do it for me. And you, Dear Reader, benefit from my "sacrifice." But it is no sacrifice. It is what I love to do. And if you don't like the product of my labor, go elsewhere and find something that does please you. Just know that I will not stop because it makes me happy to create.

Selfishness is a prime component of happiness. It took me decades to learn this lesson. Prior to this, I put others before myself. The result was that I became bitter and angry and sad. I was dying inside. And no one loved me for this. They hated me as they should have. But I found my way, and I will never go back to that. I live for me. No one will take from me what is mine. No one will filch the happiness I now have. I will never crawl into that grave again. And I will not feel guilty or apologize for doing what is best for me. I deserve what I have.

In conclusion, it is good and right to be selfish. Do not sacrifice for others, and do not expect them to sacrifice for you. Be neither slave nor master. Just look out for number one and be happy. You deserve it.

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