[SOC]

I got off work and got home around 4 p.m. and crashed. I woke up at 10 p.m. My sleep goes in weird cycles like that.

I was having weird dreams. Whenever I crash at unusual times like that I end up having vivid dreams. It is like my brain needs to fire up some synapses or what have you. I do not know the biological purpose of dreams and why we evolved to have them.

I have had some recurring dreams. For years, I had the same recurring dream that even though I graduated college my old high school had called me to inform me they had screwed up, and I had not actually graduated. They were going to inform my university of my changed status which would mean my college degree would be rescinded even though I had earned the damn thing. So, I had to go back to high school again at my present age and retake classes. But I think the whole thing is a goddamn joke, so I blow it off. AND I AM FAILING. The course I am failing the worst is English--my major in college.

Needless to say, that is a nightmare for me. But I keep having that same dream though lately it seems to have abated. Freudians out there will tell me it is packed with significance, but I think it reflects very real fears that I have. The first is that I will lose recognition for the things I have learned. The second is the reality that you forget things you have learned. Finally, high school was the worst time of my life. I never have nightmares about having to return to college.

The other recurring nightmare I have is that I suddenly become stupid and decide to become a thief. Nothing happens to me, but I condemn myself to the constant paranoia that I am going to get caught. This paranoia turns out to be worse than actually getting caught. This reflects my belief that being happy trumps being rich. Dishonest gain is antithetical to happiness.

I can't recall any other recurring dreams except the one where I am able to fly/float mere inches from the ground. That is a weird one, but I have heard others say they have the same dream.

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