FRIDAY

1. There is a rumor they have discovered the God particle at the LHC. Or it could be a piece of corn chip. Scientists can be such slobs.

2. The government lectures us on smoking, wearing seatbelts, wearing helmets, eating healthy, getting exercise, losing weight, not burning fossil fuels, etc. But they seem to never lecture us about financial literacy or responsibility. Hmmmm...

3. McCain opened his mouth today about the "heroes" in Libya. I now realize that Obama really was the lesser of two evils.

4. Paul Reiser has a new show on NBC? I must admit that I am truly underwhelmed by this news. I didn't think he could make anything that sucked as bad as Mad About You, but he has managed to top himself. Keep up the good work, Paul!



5. TIP FOR PAUL: Shave that melon.

6. Lindsay is back in jail. They should go ahead and put a name on her orange jumpsuit.

7. Obama says Bradley Manning broke the law. OK, I can go with that. Laws matter. Of course, they don't matter when walking all over the Constitution to start another fucking war. You can wipe your ass with those laws then.

"I run this motherfucker," Obama said.

8. There is one good thing I will say about Donald Trump. He makes Ron Paul look mainstream.

9. Obama celebrated Earth Day by tossing his copy of the Constitution in the recycling bin. There was a noticeable shit stain on it.

10. Fuck Obama.

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