How To Be A Great Leader

Leadership takes many forms. A teacher is a leader. A coach is a leader. A boss is a leader. A parent is a leader. We have lots of leaders, and everyone of them has expressed frustration at some point that their people just don't get it. They can't seem to get their people to do what they want. They will try bribing them and threatening them. They will tweak rules, policies, and strategies. But the people are just resistant to the changes. Why is this?

Once upon a time, I was a boss, and I had come to this point of frustration. The people I was in charge of exhibited all sorts of behaviors that I just couldn't stand. One of the biggest problems I had was that they were always late for work. They weren't massively late. Just five minutes here and there every damn day. Then, during the workday, I would have to rip their ass for spending more time chattering instead of working. Finally, one day, I asked one of my guys why they did this shit. The reply was classic. The guy said, "We do this because it is what we see you do."

It was a shocker, but he was right. Every one of the things my people did were the exact same things I did. I was screaming at a mirror. The flaws I saw in them were the flaws I had in myself. The secret to changing my people could be found in changing myself.

If you look at any great organization, you will see a great leader who embodies the values and virtues the organization emulates. The most famous example I can give is Apple with Steve Jobs. Apple is a unique and strange company just like Steve Jobs. Apple's strength and flaws are the same as Steve's strength and flaws.

Plato pointed out that a child will act differently around one parent than he will around other. Similarly, people pick up on the values and virtues of their leaders and respond in kind. If you have a lazy leader who doesn't give a shit, the people will not give a shit. If you have a leader who is an asshole, the people will be assholes. The effect is not immediate, but it is inescapable.

The problem bad leaders have is that they have yet to come to terms with their own flaws. They have yet to assess their own character and be who they need to be. They don't see themselves screaming at the mirror. They see some other person in the glass instead of seeing themselves. The moment they see themselves and realize it then they are on the way to becoming great leaders. The next step is personal change. To change others you have to change yourself.

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