Day 2

The grief comes in waves like rain bands from a hurricane. I will feel fine one minute then a fresh wave of pain and loss will hit me. Then, it subsides.

I hate breaking up. I don't think women feel anything. They are quick to love you and just as quick to hate you. Men are slow to love, but the feelings remain after the woman is gone. They have to fade like a memory.

Experience has taught me that there is no shortcut on this. You just deal. As for regrets, I don't have any. You try to fathom if there was some way it could have gone differently. But there was no way. You can't beat yourself up over it.

I have a friend of mine who is married and is a devoted husband and father of two lovely daughters. He is a great guy. I asked him what he would do if he ever lost his wife. He told me he would never be with any other woman. She was the one. He wouldn't even try.

That is an important lesson for me. Stop trying. I was already apathetic when I met her. Now, forget it. I've reached a new level of don't give a damn about women. I'm solidly in George Clooney territory now. Love, marriage, all of it--a pure ball of misery.

I feel a new wave coming, so I'll end it here.

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