I am an amateur student of economics, and it doesn't take long to realize in studying that field how much trust plays a part in economic exchange. Employers trust employees to do the job. Consumers trust restaurants and manufacturers to provide products that will not kill them. Banks and other lending institutions consult your credit score to see how risky you are.
In the personal arena, trust is also a big issue. Friends trust friends. Spouses trust their significant others not to cheat on them or take their money. If you're not a trusting person, it can be pretty lonely.
Like it or not, there's very little you can do without putting some sort of trust in other people and institutions. I think this may explain the concept of branding. People will pay more for the brand name over some more generic product because they know what they are getting. This is why folks will eat at McDonald's over a local place. You know what you're getting at Mickey D's.
For me, I'm willing to enter into economic exchanges because it beats the alternative. Besides, I find most businesses realize that it is in their long term interest not to fuck over their customers. But I take a different tack when it comes to my personal relationships. Because I have been fucked over by friends, girlfriends, and family, I tend to not want to trust anyone. This doesn't mean that I don't have people in my life. I've just learned to be very selective when it comes to them.
50% of all marriages end in divorce. That's a high number. Plus, the half that remain married are probably miserable but stay together out of tradition. In addition, it is reported that 60% of married men and 40% of married women cheat on their spouses. These numbers are based on what these folks are willing to confess to. The reality is that these numbers are much higher. Conservative estimates are that 80% of all marriages will experience infidelity at some point.
These numbers are the primary reason why I don't ever want to be married. Monogamy is a myth, and love is bullshit. Like it or not, screwing around is the norm while fidelity is the exception. If I ever doubt this, I simply look no further than the married people I work with and how many of them cheat on their spouses or have cheated on them. Sad to say, very few are faithful.
This is some cynical shit, but as I say, it is what it is. I generally trust a woman not to spit in my food at the restaurant where she works, but I can't trust her not to fuck the Eduardo, the assistant manager. Why is this? Basically, you can trust people to pursue their self-interest. It isn't that people are evil so much as interested only in themselves. I've never met an unfaithful person who did it because they wanted to hurt their spouse. They just wanted to fulfill their passion. The same thing applies to people who steal to use drugs.
Human beings are scoundrels, and I include myself in this group. Now, I don't go around fucking over people because I never considered this to be a smart move. I think it pays to be honest and responsible. Other people aren't as forward looking as myself. I've always believed in the dictum that you don't shit where you eat. As a consequence, I look out for the people who look out for me. I don't rob from my employer. And I don't cheat on girlfriends.
But I have also learned to never put myself in a situation where I can be taken advantage of. This is why I will never marry. Odds are you are are going to be a loser on that deal. I also don't lend money to friends. You'll never see that shit again. But beyond that, you're going to get fucked sooner or later. Consequently, whenever a person or business tries to gank me, I go after them. This isn't a revenge thing so much as looking out for my interests. If you let people fuck you over, they will do it again and again. This is why I rail against the government and never hesitate to call a customer service line over something I don't like. In short, I am an asshole. But this is what it takes.
In terms of my personal relationships, I am friendly enough, but I carry a hard edge to me now. This isn't my observation but something other people tell me. They say things like "you're intimidating" or "you never smile." This isn't exactly true since I clown around a lot, tell a lot of jokes, and basically make up bullshit about a lot of personal vices I don't have. I don't gamble, drink, or do anything else that is fun. But it is more fun to say I do these things. Yet, people keep telling me that I am scary to be around.
I don't go around threatening people. But I don't let people walk all over me. That is what people figure out about me. I believe in treating people a certain way, but I also insist that they treat me a certain way as well. You teach people how you want to be treated. This doesn't mean being a dickhead because those same people will be a dickhead to you. This doesn't mean being cruel to people. I'm not into that shit. But it means having respect for yourself. It really is true that you can't love other people if you don't love yourself.
I think if you have your mind right on this shit, you will attract the right kinds of people to you while repelling others. For instance, Wal-Mart doesn't attract the litigious because they have always refused out of court settlements as a matter of principle. Consequently, no one wants to sue them. If you're a slacker as a boss, you will attract slack employees. If you're an honest employer, you will attract honest employees. But if you're a shyster, you will attract shysty people.
For me, I have always been an altruist. Consequently, I have always attracted parasites. Since changing my mindset on that, those people are no longer in my life. I have even put it to the test by getting in touch with some old parasites who now want nothing to do with me anymore. It really does work.
That's the secret to it all. You shouldn't become a hermit or a tyrant. Just treat people the way you want to be treated and expect the same in return.
0 comments:
Post a Comment