Overlook, Ignore, and Forget

One of my favorite books is Alexandre Dumas's The Count of Monte Cristo. For those unfamiliar with this tale, this guy named Edmond Dantes gets fucked over by some assholes and spends 19 years in a hellhole prison hungering for revenge until the day comes when he is able to enact it. The thing that always gets to me is why Dantes just didn't let that shit go. The guy ends up becoming fabulously wealthy and better off than if he had never been fucked over in the first place. But I suppose the dreams of his earlier dashed prospects meant more to him than the reality of any present good fortune.

This is something I think about a great deal. I have been fucked over. It's hard to get through life without this happening every once in awhile. But I also know that it is pointless to dwell on that shit. By doing this, you give the present and the future to the past. I see people who do this over and over. For instance, I know one guy who wrecks every relationship he gets in because of some bitch that fucked him over years ago.

I don't believe in forgiveness. I can understand when people make honest mistakes, and I'm willing to make amends on that shit. But there are some things you can never forgive. For instance, I couldn't forgive Osama bin Laden for his crimes. There are some people that have been in my life that I will never forgive. But I also refuse to fuck myself by dwelling on what they did to me.

I overlook these things. I ignore these people. I forget they ever existed. This is a good strategy because it enables me to go on in life. I can't change what they did, and I can't right the wrong without causing severe physical harm to them. So, I do what is in my best interest and fuhgeddaboutit.

I am someone who believes in having a solid grasp on reality as well as respecting yourself enough to not let people take advantage of you. This forgetting advice might seem to contradict this, but I find that the key lies in a balance between the extremes. I don't believe in being either naive or bitter. I do believe in not emphasizing some realities more than others especially when they are not constructive.

Maybe you are getting over a nasty divorce. Maybe you are the loser in some office battle. Or maybe some asshole jacked your car stereo and then took a steaming shit on the dash of your auto. I don't know what it is, but I do know that revenge is not the answer. You'll only end up in jail or worse. I can also tell you that life will go on, and it will go better for you if you just forget about the shit. You can't change it, and it makes no sense to relive it. Let that shit go and learn the truth that living well is the best revenge.

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