Top 10 Things You Need To Know About the C-Man

I don't have much of a biography. I write a lot about things I believe in or find interesting, but I don't write too much about myself. People ask me things about me, and I gave it some thought. Then, I decided to write this essay. These are the things you need to know about me.

1. SOUTH CAROLINA

I was born and raised in South Carolina. It took me five years of living in Florida to make me love SC and realize it was home. I've been to different places, and I think it is good to live in other places for a bit. But my home is South Carolina, and I'm never leaving it again. I don't care what jobs may lie elsewhere or if my girlfriend wants to drag me somewhere else. I am never leaving SC again. Being in Florida taught me how homesick I was for this place, and I love every inch of this state. I love Columbia and Myrtle Beach and Charleston and Greenville and even my hometown of Camden. Whatever I do with the rest of my life will be done here in SC.

2. LIBERTARIAN

I believe in social freedom and economic freedom. I've always believed in economic freedom, but I have evolved on the social side. This doesn't mean I smoke pot or drink or what have you. But I don't care if other people do those things as long as no one else gets hurt. As for the government, I believe in Nozick's concept of the nightwatchman state. This makes me a minarchist. I want just enough government to keep the peace and to leave me the hell alone.

3. FREETHINKER

I used to be a Christian. I even attended seminary with the goal of becoming a Presbyterian minister. Then, while at seminary, my roommate killed himself, and I found the body. The reason for the suicide was that he was a closeted homosexual hiding his secret from everyone and trying to attend seminary and be a good Christian. He was a poor deluded fool and so was I. I needed that tragedy to shock me into reality, and I have not regretted the loss of my faith. I don't believe in God or fairy tales. I question things now. I need proof to believe in something. Religion has no proof.

Some Christians will say that I am just mad at God and running away from Jesus. All I can say is that they are wrong. You can't be mad at something that isn't real. The denial was before I lost my faith not after I lost it. Now, I just don't care.

4. FAMILY

I have a brother named Jason who I keep in touch with on a regular basis. He makes me laugh and peppers this blog with outrageous comments under various handles.

I have never been married, and I have no children. I have no real desire to change this.

5. BLUE COLLAR

I graduated from the University of South Carolina in 1994 with a BA in English. People will say that this was a waste of time and money, and I am inclined to agree. I think 95% of college degrees are worthless. It's like buying an encyclopedia that is outdated in less than a decade, but you get to keep making payments on it. Fortunately for me, I avoided such student debt through a combination of work and help from my mom and dad. As for my major, I delivered pizzas with a chemical engineer. I recommend that people go to two year technical schools and learn a real trade they can get a job with such as welding, industrial maintenance, and diesel mechanics. You have a marketable skill that pays well for a fraction of the cost. The alternative is medical school where you get to amass student debt and hope you don't flunk out. I recommend plastic surgery as your specialty. It will be the only area not socialized by Uncle Sam.

I have only held one job in my life that required a college degree, and I hated it. I was coordinator for a company known now as FedEx Ground, and I hated every day of that job. Basically, my duties were to babysit fucktards while working for fucktards. The frustration and stress were so much that I started to drink on an almost daily basis. Finally, I quit. I was done. No more bullshit.

The jobs I enjoy doing are of the blue collar variety. I like working and being in control of what happens with my work. You don't get this being the boss. Being the boss is simply crisis management. You merely respond to shit as it hits the fan. You go home every day feeling like a failure because the people you have working for you are worthless. I dog out anyone who works for me or with me who doesn't share my enthusiasm for work or my values. As for the bosses, they are no different than the workers. They are lazy idiots with no honor or pride in their work.

My other white collar options are to go into financial services and the law which involve moral compromises that I know I can't make. I can't sell someone a product or a service that I would not use myself and thought was harmful. I am also not into playing office politics.

There are only two avenues I am keenly interested in. The first is doing work that is valuable and honest. The second is being an entrepreneur. I can manage employees that I get to hire and fire. The secret is to hire people just like me, and I meet them all the time. I could build an army out of the overlooked character and talent I see in the corporate ranks. So, I want to add to my blue collar skill set and perhaps start a business that provides basic goods and services like carpet cleaning, plumbing, or hamburgers. And I want to hire all those good people who are like me and do really good work.

I have no interest in bullshit careers. I don't want to run for public office or be a stockbroker or run some shady business or climb the corporate ladder by sycophancy and treachery. This is Slimeworld. I don't belong in Slimeworld. I am a blue collar guy, and if that condemns me to blue collar pay, I would rather have that and remain happy.

6. GIRLFRIENDS

I am not an optimist when it comes to love, and I am not a romantic. I will never marry. This is because love is bullshit, and I know this with the same certainty that I know the sun will rise tomorrow. But I love my girlfriend, and she is the only one I want. My sobriety on matters of the heart makes me choose good women now, and it is working well for me.

I distinguish between chemical love and real love. I hate chemical love. It is all hormones and pheromones. I prefer the deep and abiding love that comes from caring for a woman who is worth a damn. Chemical love fades. Real love endures. Only time indicates which one you've got.

7. WRITER

I write every single day. It is a compulsion for me. My day is not normal unless I put words on a page. Writing is the only thing I do really well. It doesn't pay well which means I will always have the dayjob. But I can't stop doing it anymore than I can stop showering, shaving, or brushing my teeth. I will be a writer until the day I die.

8. THE LOGO

I have always been called "Big C" for as long as I remember. I sign all my informal letters with my initial. Then, I decided I needed to market myself which meant having a brand. A simple "C" intrigued me, but I decided to throw the dot on the end. It is a mixture of ego and humility. I now sport a tattoo with the logo, and it is me.

9. THE LOSER

I am not rich or famous. I'm not much on status. I don't do envy or shame. There are people better than me and people worse than me. I have achieved some of my goals but not all of them. I have made mistakes but also avoided a lot of other mistakes. But when anyone asks, I tell them the same thing. I am a loser. This admission is like a gut punch to everyone but me. People tell me I have a low self-esteem, but I have a blog and a logo for chrissakes. I like who I am.

I practice a great deal of irony and self-deprecation. This is because I'm not into the status game. I like to tell people I work at McDonald's or dropped out of high school or still live with my parents. Most people tend to embellish. I do the opposite. The result is that people give up trying to insult me or hurt my feelings or whatever. I just don't care what people think of me. This brings me a great deal of freedom.

10. ODDS AND ENDS

-I do not smoke, drink, or use drugs.

-I eat healthy 90% of the time which means no hamburgers. But I will steal french fries.

-I am fat and out of shape. My secret dream is to lose weight and get in shape and run marathons. I used to run in my twenties and will definitely do it again in my forties as I try to overcome the midlife anxiety of knowing my life is half over. But my thirties have been slack as hell.

-I am not allowed to talk about my job. Seriously. Don't even ask what I do.

-Beyond writing, reading a lot of books and articles on the internet, and strapping on my running shoes to get my monthly exercise, I have no hobbies. I don't collect stamps, hunt, fish, play golf, or belong to a BDSM swingers club. I think these things are a waste of time and money and can be rough on the nipples.

-I am a workaholic. The amount of control I feel over my life is directly proportional to the number of hours I work in a week. Deprived of work, I become depressed and agitated and not much fun to be around. It is my ambition to work 7 days a week. And, no, I'm not cutting your grass or painting your house unless you are willing to pay me. Work without pay is like sex without orgasm.

-I shave my head everyday. I'm not a fan of hair.

I think that's it for autobiographical information you need to know about me or even care to know about me. Now, go mind your own business.

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