Random Thoughts on Various Subjects

1. LONG WEEKEND

I got three days off the job because of the holiday on Monday. Three days of pure hell. I have a list of things to try and keep me busy, but I am not looking forward to the time off.

I know this attitude and mindset is foreign to most people, but this is why I am the way I am. Underneath all of this, I am fundamentally a nihilist. Life has no ultimate meaning. In the larger scheme of things, nothing you say, do, or think will ever matter. People might run to religion to escape this ultimate reality. Others turn to drugs and alcohol. I turn to work. Work is the difference between being deluded or staring into the abyss.

Work gives meaning to a life that is ultimately meaningless. This is why I do it. Getting paid is nice, but I work to fool myself for awhile. Work gives purpose to an existence that has no real purpose. Without work, there is simply nothing. This is when your thoughts grow dark, and you become depressed. With work, you simply have the task at hand. When that is completed, you go to the next task. Then, you do the next task. The goal is to always have something to do.

Long weekends are long stretches of nothing. People tell me I need a hobby. Well, I have this gigantic fucking blog I have been keeping for five years. I think that counts as a hobby. But my mental energies are much shorter than my physical energies. My best thoughts come to me when I am working. I keep a notebook in my pocket and sometimes just scraps of paper with ideas written down on them. These ideas come to me all day long as I am working. The labor keeps me awake and moving. My brain feels like it is on fire. I lose myself in that constant stream of experience. I use generous amounts of coffee as a catalyst.

I am the popular guy at work everyone wants to work with. I was a bit surprised by this revelation, but I kept hearing it from the different people I work with. I tried to think back over my working life if there was ever anyone I really enjoyed working with over the others, but there isn't. I seem to like everyone equally. But for some reason, I seem to be everyone's favorite. But this only seems to be during the workday. Outside of work, I seem to be fairly normal and boring to everyone.

I don't think there is anything special about me, but I think it is that work thing that gets people all excited. My popularity is a spillover effect of an idea. As one co-worker put it to me, "I just worked a thirteen hour day, but it felt shorter than any other day I ever worked. Time just seems to fly when you are on the job."

My experience in working is not the same as everyone else's. I know this. For everyone else, leisure is fun while work is hell. For me, leisure is hell while work is fun. I wondered if it was a social thing, but I find I am just as happy working alone as I am in a group. In fact, I seem to enjoy working alone even more than working with others because the frustration level goes to virtual zero. The only thing that really kills the stoke for me is working with people that don't have the same enthusiasm for work that I do or try to kill it in others. But I am getting better on this front.

I have never fully indulged this enthusiasm for the work that I have. I feel like I am trapped in a cage, but the door of the cage is wide open. I don't have to stay in it. I allow others to restrain me, and I think I would like to just really go with this flow experience. I am not a true workaholic. I keep bowing to what everyone else expects of me and calls "normal." This is why I am now facing a three day stretch of nothing. This has to change. I need more work to do.

2. GLENN BECK SAYONARA

Glenn Beck wrapped it up on Fox News this week. It has been a strange rise and fall for that guy. He went from being seriously considered as a replacement for Bill O'Reilly who is the juggernaut of cable news to being a bit of a joke. How did this happen? When did Glenn Beck jump the shark?

People will say that Beck is unhinged and nuts. But I hear the same shit about O'Reilly and Olbermann. People point to the conspiracy theory bullshit he espoused. But Alex Jones and Jesse Ventura mine this vein for considerable audience interest. So, why did Beck rise and fall with the Fox audience and advertisers?

Some people claim that Beck angered the Jewish folks with antisemitic remarks. Others say Fox torpedoed him because the guy is a loose cannon. Others say he has simply gone berzerk nuts. But I know the real reason.

Glenn Beck lacks integrity. In this usage, I point to the true definition of integrity which is to be complete and undivided. You have the same qualities always. They remain the same. You can be a complete ass clown like O'Reilly and Olbermann as long as you are consistent. You can be a complete deluded flake like Alex Jones and still have a large following. What got to people about Glenn Beck was the simple fact that the guy was always changing his message, his stance, or what have you. This is not necessarily a bad thing, but it becomes a problem. It makes people think you have no true convictions on anything.

I felt a certain enthusiasm for Beck when he went "libertarian." But he isn't a libertarian. I felt punked and dropped his worthless ass as quickly as I started liking him. This is why Beck lost a million viewers. You never know where that guy is going in his thinking. People don't like this especially conservatives.

I have certain core beliefs, and the last time I made radical change to those beliefs was when I became an atheist a decade ago. I lost some friends on that, but I have stuck with it since then. Beyond that, I have only made minor changes in my thought. My conservatism became libertarianism as I softened up considerably on social issues like drugs, gay marriage, etc. On other issues, the changes have not been as dramatic. They have been incremental. I can safely say that in twenty years I will still be a libertarian and an atheist. In twenty years, I think Glenn Beck will be a Muslim communist.

3. DOMINIQUE STRAUSS-KAHN

I try not to be a conspiracy theorist, but that whole spectacle with former IMF chief Dominique Strauss-Kahn smells as fishy as anything I have ever witnessed. The rape case against him has virtually self-destructed as the accuser is now seen as a complete lying bitch with a shady past. Was DSK character assassinated to remove him from the IMF? It makes me wonder. Clearly, in the instances of Assange and Spitzer, sexual activity is a good way to eliminate someone or hamper them especially if it can be misconstrued as perversion or rape. We live in a time now when the sex lives of famous people are now fair game. The irony is that we live in a world of internet porn and gay marriage, yet things seem so much more puritanical than before. This isn't to excuse misbehavior, but it is obvious to me that the sex life of a person is irrelevant to the job they do.

In the future, you are going to see a new person emerge. Charlie Sheen seems to be the guy blazing the trail on this. This new person is the person without shame. It is the person who doesn't give a fuck about their reputations or the gossip pages. This will be the guy who posts his pecker pictures on Twitter and doesn't deny it like Weiner did. "Was that me? You better believe it, baby!!" Winning!

4. HACKTIVISM

I am uneasy with the efforts of Anonymous, LulzSec, and others who see hacking as a legitimate tool in advancing a cause. I will explain. Imagine I see a guy who doesn't have adequate smoke alarms or fire extinguishers in his house. I am concerned about the lack of safety, so I decide to "help" him out by setting his porch on fire. This is what these hackers do when they go after websites with shoddy security. Granted, it is good to know that certain websites suck in regards to these issues. But is this the best way to accomplish this?

In the real world, we don't allow this stuff to happen. This is the ends justifying the means. The problem is that the definition of the "end" is simply nonsense. For instance, a company can get rid of a frivolous lawsuit by settling. The result is that the frivolous lawsuits multiply. So, a company like Walmart fights every lawsuit tooth-and-claw even if the legal costs are greater than the settlement. This is because Walmart knows that there is no such thing as the "end." Shit never ends. This is why people live by principles. This is why people also forget principles and then revert back to them later. (I will have more on this topic in a future post.)

The end does not justify the means. What LulzSec demonstrates is that the internet is not to be trusted, and this gives rise to the very thing these folks do not want which is the looming specter of government regulation and control of the internet. The problem with vigilantism is that it often produces injustices. This happens when you go and kill the wrong guy. When I talk about LulzSec, I hear the same thing from people. "Those bastards better not be exposing MY info to the world." These grey hats need to rethink their strategy.

5. CHAVEZ WITH CANCER

Hugo Chavez had a cancerous tumor removed. Unfortunately, Venezuela has not had the cancerous tumor removed that is Hugo Chavez. I never thought cancer could ever be a positive thing, but in the case of Chavez, I am on the side of the big C.

6. ROMNEY

The only politician more duplicitous than Obama is Mitt Romney. Yet, Mitt is leading in the polls. Fucking amazing shit. This only goes to show that the problem isn't with the politicians but the voters. Stupid people cannot elect a smart or honest leader.

7. SHIA LABEOUF

Shia admits he fucked Megan Fox and Indy 4 sucked. Shia is now on the shit lists of Megan Fox and Harrison Ford. I admire the guy's candor, but it may doom his future with hot chicks. Unfortunately, it won't prevent another Transformers movie. As bad as Indy 4 was, it sure beats those three Transformers flicks.


8. C-BLOG ADVERTISEMENTS

I don't carry ads on my blog because I don't find them to be financially rewarding or aesthetically appealing. But I have wanted to promote causes that I believe in and give support to non-profit ventures that I think do good work. To that end, I will be donating regular space to promoting those organizations and causes. They are simply an extension of what I already believe in and discuss here, so I don't think this free advertising will be as disruptive as a banner ad for free viagra.

Posted in: